Blowin' in the wind

My 'friend' (read ex fiancee/still current sack buddy - a girl has needs after all) D, is a firm believer in oral sex. Or more to the point, the recieving of oral sex. Which puts him in the same category as, lets see.... 99.9972% of all men on the face of the planet.

Blow jobs - men may like to think it's a male dominance thing
but in truth they only tell themselves that to give
themselves a sense of reassurance when they realise that in
fact their fleshy pride & joy is nestled ever so precariously
within a nest of shiny white enamel. One bite & it's all over
Rover.

Oral sex truly breaches the wall of sexual diversity. Gay,
straight, tri-curious, male, female, not-too-sure-but-close-
enough - everyone loves a licking. Sure, we girls get all
fancy & call it cunnilingus but what do you expect from the
percentage of humanity that buys $400 heels? Put a pretty
label on it and we'll be fighting like cats to get us a
piece.

There's a whole ettiquite to the deed as well - and it goes
well beyond the age old swallow/not to swallow debacle.
Depth, teeth, pressure, breathing, hand position......
there's a lot of thought & effort that goes into a good blow
job. They should give out awards for the really good ones &
little 'Thanks For Participating' ribbons for the ones who
tried..... but just didn't quite get there in the end.

It was a 6"5 blonde transexual who first taught me the fine
art of prostate stimulation. I was intregued, curious even,
to find out that this red taloned individual was offering to
provide me with the dark secret to what 'she' guaranteed was
the key to almost instant gratification.

"It's easy pumpkin" (Somewhat disturbingly my grandmother
also calls me pumpkin - a mental image that's sure to scar me
even further) "Just wait until he's ready to blow then stuff
him with a knuckle load."

Valuable advice from a man who can dance all night in 6 inch
stilettos. Needless to say, I still wonder how many
individuals had experienced an encounter with those
formidable false fingernails. And just how many times 'she'
had to replace them after a mysterious disappearance during
the night.

But, all asides aside - back to the point. No matter what the
language, the setting, the participant; There's always
someone jacking off to some skanky blonde bobbing like
there's no tomorrow & copping a load in the cheek - thank god
for internet porn. If more people were out there
giving/recieving their chosen oral sub-genre there'd be fewer
problems - we'd all be too content to give three shits about
the fucked up state of society. Hell, we'd all be on our
backs getting blown so there'd be no one to explode buses &
bludgeon baby seals in the first place.


So reach out to your fellow man. Give someone you love a
blowjob today.