Or some simply say they don't like them. Well shit man, you don't like em? Well damn, you're bang outta luck. Guess you don't like getting laid either.
I'm sure everybody knows condoms come in different sizes. If you didn't, well, you do now. Sorry for busting open that little secret. From itty-bitty cute ones to something that I can fit my entire arm in. And if it's bigger than that well sorry, it's just not happening anyway. I very much like my ability to walk thank you very much. Was nice meeting you though. Goodnight.
As for allergies? That's easy. Either you come prepared with the latex-free goodness or dude, you're not getting on this ride.
The erection thing, I'll concede, may actually be true, albeit in a very very small section of men. Hell, I'm still amazed by erections in general - those things are all kinds of awesome to watch. But sorry, I'm not going to buy it if you tell me your currently raging hardon isn't going to survive me removing my hand/mouth for all of a minute to slap a wrapper on that sucker. If by chance it actually doesn't well there's plenty of fun to be had - so long as it's away from the baby chute.
But my dear ladyfriends, you're not without responsibility either. No is a lot easier to say than "Hi, remember me? We fucked a month ago & now I've got syphilis." Or the eternal crowd pleaser - "I'm pregnant". And don't rely on him bringing the goodies to the party. Go forth & buy your own rubbers. They come in lots of pretty colours - co-ordinate them with your outfit if you're into that. Plus did you know you can make waterproof microphones with them? Neither did I until right now. That's kinda cool isn't it?
Basically dude, put on a damn rubber on or it's just not happening. I don't know where your dick has been poking itself & for that matter, you don't know who else has taken a tour of downtown gash-ville. And it's a nice tour, believe me.
1 comment:
Many guys will insist they are "clean" and probably genuinely believe they are as well - but by trusting them, you are also trusting all their exes who promised them the same thing. I don't like condoms either, but I try to remind myself of this in the heat of the moment!
I don't know how it is in other countries, but in the UK, STI tests for men have moved beyond the scary days of poking thin tubes in there. I am reliably informed that now, a urine sample and blood test will show up any nasties.
As for women - again, no speculum needed. Last time I was tested, I was handed an oversized cotton bud, pointed in the direction of a small cubicle and did the swab myself!
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