However mostly I find I read about sex. Because I like sex. A lot. It's fun, I like having it, like writing about it. And I like learning new things. Sex combines a lot of things I like (especially if you're an adventurous soul like myself) - bottom line, it's fun and can quite often be educational.
Hence the reason I have Semenex bookmarked. Partly for the curiousity value, partly because I find the premise absolutely fucking hilarious.
"Anciently, semen was revered as the magical "Elixir Vitae," offering healing and rejuvenation to the adoring female devotees who drank regularly from the male "fountain."
Today, sex research has proved that healthy semen actually possesses "as-yet unknown properties" that provide females with truly "wonderful health benefits."
Note they only mention female devotees. What about those stereotypically fashion conscious young men who like a little male fountain action? Are they apparently doomed to miss out on these afformentioned 'wonderful health benefits'? Apparently they're a little homophobic over at Semenex. Either that or they've really overlooked a major portion of the dick sucking demographic.
I particularly like the 'scientific research' that states semen has some kind of depression busting organism that instantly makes women feel terrifically happy to have a mouth full of nice, warm jizz. That's a therapy method that might be a little hard to sell to the general public.
Now what I find most curious is the fact that none of our Semenex friends seem to be able to pin down an actual flavour. Pineapple, banana, strawberry, broccoli, and celery are all mentioned (in the same sentence no less - what a wonderful flavour combination) And pumpkin pie. Really, What. The. Fuck. If I wanted anything to taste pumpkin pie chances are I'd go eat a slice of pumpkin pie.Blow shouldn't taste like pumpkin pie. And unless you're giving head to a pina colada, it shouldn't really taste like fruit salad either. Or broccoli.
Look, I really don't care if it works, if it tastes like magical fairy dust or if blowjobs really are the cure for depression. What intrigues me the most is who the hell buys this? A quote suggests one group of potential customers...
"Semenex is where to go for delicious sperm guaranteed. Finally, an answer to the 'I don't like the taste' argument."
- MAXIM Magazine
Ever thought maybe she just doesn't want your day long sweaty cock in her mouth? You think buying this product will what, prove her wrong & force her to suck your dick on principle? Take a shower then ask politely fuckwad. If that fails go down on her with the condition she return the favour. As for any ladies who may think wonderfully fruity semen in a jar is a good idea, save your cash. Buy a strap on or something.
Semen is never going to taste like chocolate dipped sunshine but really - provided he's not eating garlic coated asparagus - I personally don't find the taste that unbearable. But if you're really that worried/unable to stomach the amazingly bland taste, simply make him stick to the rules (Believe me, you're not going to have an argument - the mere suggestion of a BJ is a terrific motivator for any guy)
Good
Fruit, chocolate, sugars, candy, icecream,basically anything sweet
Neutral
Pasta, breads, milk products, meat products.From experience most healthy semen tends to taste like flour paste. And you really shouldn't be blowing any crackheads/walking pharmaceutical incubators so make sure he can stand up before you start going down on him.
Bad
Asparagus (yes, that one's very very true), garlic, onion, strong tasting fish, excessively salty foods, pretty much anything with very strong flavours. Keep away from those. Really
And for the love of all that is holy - shower first. I understand that it's a huge turn on for guys to come home after a long day & recieve a little oral loving from your (here's hoping) obliging partner. But even as a girl who freely admits to enjoy giving oral sex, there is nothing - nothing - worse than being confronted with a penis that has been imprisoned in your pants and fermenting in ball sweat all day. Shower shower shower - can't make that important enough.
In the end (I'm tragic for obvious puns) you've got yourself some options - spit, swallow, don't let him come in your mouth in the first place. It's not as if you're using his semen as mouth wash so suck up that gagging reflex a little longer & allow it sit on your tongue for 2 minutes - it's not going to kill you. Hell, you might even collect on some of those mysterious "wonderful health benefits" on the way to the bathroom sink
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